SIDEMEN 7 STAR VS 1 STAR HOTEL (KSI EDITION) (2023)

I am the host I get to decide which team is which I have all the power, which team will enjoy an expensive hotel experience of the finest order, and which team will suffer trust me.

The chief Hotel team will not be having a good time, be sure to subscribe and let's find out the teams Paul Simon.

Oh, wait.

Go on one side.

Ethan.

Go on one side.

Go on this side.

Oh just go on this side.

Shall we go in this hurry? Oh no.

Yeah.

Okay.

How do we spoke with Simon it's, the same teams as we were? And we just swapped sides, oh, wait Ethan, swap with Toby, shut up Josh.

What with Vic Josh swap with Vic and uh with Harry.

Why is this so drawn out? Um, swap with Toby what's going on? Okay, you three, yeah.

I want you to go in this car? Okay, you three.

And when you go into that car, I've had enough I've had enough, oh, no Lads.

Another dingy blacked out vehicle I.

Think you don't get comfy because he's 100 coming and being like, yeah, I've got [ __, ], James frames on my team again.

It only means bad things.

These days, it's, dark that was dark, too.

Don't worry, it's, not I'm, not moving back because he's gonna make us swap see Josh, stay there.

What's going on Simon say that stay there.

Toby, stay there.

Hey team, hey.

Now, no, no.

No, no.

No, no, no, no, no, no, no I like I like James.

Friends got a light on his camera.

That's, pretty cool we're in a black van.

Of course, he's got a life.

You know, it's, bad news with pan down there.

We've been giving a load of supplies if you ever got a 20 minute Journey, we don't need supplies right? So we turn the light off just to show what the dungeon van looks like all right.

So we have one of the most calculated thinkers in assignment.

And we have the person who knows JJ the best which one will reign supreme today.

Well, I'm pessimist.

So I'm always gonna say, I'm a bad team.

Also we have John and John always goes to the stinkers Josh has also never been on the good teams.

Yeah, you're.

You two also like my guys to check on the bad team.

Now we got.

Yeah.

Hello.

Are we there yet, oh, KSI has come back and he's about to tell us boys step out of the van I've got something much nicer for you I'm making one last change, [, __, ] off, psych, oh, bro.

This guy, he's the worst, you know, I wouldn't be surprised if yeah, this is actually turning him on I.

Think it is the power just walking around with a sticky.

He's got an absolute Chum for the power.

[ __, ], erect.

Okay, with my feelings.

This is abused right now.

Can you see me? No, oh geez.

Wow.

Now you can see me what do you say? Where are we going Simon ever the pessimist we're? Headed to the airport? I don't want to go to Europe I want to be in Dubai.

You think, good or bad, I feel like we're, getting on a plane, I'm, trying my ever so harder to not know what road I'm on right now, you can't know what road know where you've been there's, no way if you know, Dubai, you know, well, there's one long straight road to be fair, I'm, assuming Hotel check-in isn't till about 22 or three so we're in no rush I think, no no rush we'll go to the marina first 20 minutes away.

Yeah, we'll get on a yacht all the way around to the brand new Atlantis because that's where I think it is.

Do we really deserve no no to be really designed who else deserves it more than me who else deserves it? Probably everyone, no one deserves to order me.

No, why? What did he do? Bro? No, what do you do? What do I do I'm so special.

Am him.

Okay, I deserve a seven star hotel.

No, honestly, we got the bro we're going to the new hotel.

One of the best hotels in the world it's class winner, Beyonce step foot in it.

I can sniff the carpet.

We've made a ton.

We've stopped as well you're actually a GPS.

Yeah.

What could this mean? What I swear? He just said, what could this mean uncircled to be on the goods? Who's whatever afternoon did I.

He can't change.

It he's like whoever's nicest to me gets to be on the good team.

He suck his dick and he's like it seems already wiping his mouth, but you're mean, you're, wasting it is you talking about him, I'm feeling a bit less like him.

Now, The Vibes I was getting from the sun is not good.

Ah, I was just saying to the boys I feel like because the sun's over there.

Yeah, we must be traveling north we're, trying too hard, I, never thought we're heading towards the airport.

You're, overdoing.

It.

Oh [.

__ ].

He might be right, oh, [.

__ ].

No, yeah.

He has a point.

Oh bug.

Why have you used your geographer? No, no I'm, just, um.

You might be doing a circles or something you never know.

Did you hear that there was a little beep, and it sounded like one of them little vehicles in an airport that was how car beeping, oh, The Knockout.

It was while wearing one of them.

Why are you wearing your glasses like that? Well, I think it's good it's, a nice little style, blocking out the haters from behind I want to hear a cast on his voice.

I only hear the door slide over I feel like you're, quiet I feel like he'd wait.

He'd wait, oh, my God something's happening.

Oh, hello.

Let's.

Go am I taking my bag with me or not.

How are you expecting me to get out of this car with a blindfold on all right? Let's? Go the world's weirdest, Conga train.

I've left.

All my stuff in the car is that okay, I'm sure they'll put it on our lovely flight for us.

I'm scared.

There was an angry man.

Shout at me when I got off, no it didn't, give Good Vibes.

Hello.

Why are you filming us? Oh, this ain't fit in Josh's head.

Yeah.

Okay.

Oh there's actually.

Do I look like a cute panda I, can't, see Simon.

So I, don't know, we're in the lift a lift I think is good so we're going down, though what is happening to me? Please I don't like going down, I feel like going down I'm, not following anything what's happened.

Here we go this way, I'm holding back boys.

I think this is I think this is just phase two of our journey to the airport.

Oh we're in a car park.

Oh, what am I wrong? It doesn't smell like the good team, where could we possibly just walk through? It must have been like a mall, a car park.

And now we're in a room that smells like sweets.

This is really cold isn't.

It is this just for Josh it's.

My infection.

Someone just touched my head.

Someone just touched my head, James frames, touch my head again, if it's you, oh, mate.

My phone worked can I.

Just if I could do Siri call.

My brother I could ask him if the entrance to this thing was in a car park I will find out soon enough, but I want to find out now that's.

The that's, the boys take off your flies, bolts, you're, the good team.

S, that looks scary as [ __ ].

Oh, yeah.

By the way Harry is he's him.

Now, yeah, the bad team is very bad.

Oh, wait hang on.

Oh, wait.

It was open.

Ah, guys, I've been pulled.

We've lost Josh stand here are we gonna are we in like a firing line? Boys take off your blindfolds? Yep, knew it.

Yeah, no, of course we are I will never be lucky.

I told you we were why one star hunter I don't want to last we had John.

It was done from the start I have faith in the switcheroo.

There is no switch.

I don't understand this Behavior just do drugs like [, __ ].

Why do you need this [ __ ], if I do die here, I want you to tell my parents one thing to sue you to sue you all? Okay.

Thank you for everything.

You've got I'll say, he wasn't doing what he loves hanging out with the side.

Man, let me call Simon.

Yeah, call him a special.

Oh JJ for real.

This is him.

Yep, oh yeah, are they frozen? Are they frozen already? Enjoy the flight? Simon I, don't know, why? I'm being mean, [, __, ], you all right? Bye, I, didn't, even let him say anything you even gave him the satisfaction of hanging up.

Yeah, but we're done boys you're getting there by a boat haha by boat or even near sea.

Imagine hey, great.

Okay, where's the boat.

But our cars are going.

Yeah, where's our boat.

Oh, my God who's, ready to fly.

I, don't know, I'm up here.

Now, I don't think I can do it now I thought, you know, this would be a personal growth moment, but it can it can suck my ass I can't.

Do it I? Can't? Do it listen one day, you're just gonna die and then it's all done you're gonna die one day and you're gonna die.

You're, just gonna die we're in half and done.

This is near me near my ends.

Okay? But where's.

The boat I, don't know, bro tell you a joke go on it's, not a joke, no, the only boat that we have today is friendship, stand in Hatfield Lads.

Yeah.

What is this Bill's Hotel? The stand in England.

Let me guess we're trolled again, there's no boat get thrown again.

Enjoy your one star hotel, [, __, ], log one it's, such a JJ thing.

I've got suitcases.

Okay.

A [ __ ] are we getting robbed? Is that what's going on? Did we just get drapes? Give me a bag.

Hi.

Hello.

Welcome to a hotel.

Hi I'm.

Susan Beaver.

This is my husband Sebastian.

It doesn't say much, though thank you so much come to Dubai it'll be fun.

Look at Harry, just lie down Harry.

Where are you dropping [? __, ] off Harry's face.

Harry's face is is something truly beautiful.

Yeah.

Can we just get you signed? It you're? Right? Sebastian, you're, right? What's your middle name, I'll just hold on to the Y Landon.

You come in I don't want to do it.

Oh [.

__ ].

Here he comes.

Oh I.

Can't, I, don't know, if I can [ __ ], do it Vic? You just lie down relax up.

There it's, not just [ __, ] lie down, bro, the fact that I know he's judging me right now, I know, I am definitely judging you you got this roll let's.

Do it good day? Simon could I have some pictures with you? Do you think sure we can use some of my ends? Yeah, go for it say, Yorkshire, Yorkshire say, give me back, oh, no.

No, no do another one John.

You might have to take over if this one's not better.

Oh, should we do that? Yes there.

He is every time I get here.

I can't get to him.

I think, I, can't, [, __ ], show me being a [, __, ], I, don't, mind all right.

So long as I could say to him, I got like a semi-fobia.

Hello I will do this one day, but I can't.

Do it today? Sorry to get you up here.

Get me rigged up in the comments.

I do roast me, I volunteer at a local Primary School.

You want me to sign them.

Yes, please if you wouldn't mind to Henrietta h-e-n Gary, what does that sound? Sorry over there? They've locked to the gate, I got a massive gate of an events.

We could hop the fence.

Oh, no, he's gonna say the line just need your bags.

Please help.

We gotta change of plans.

It's got like an emergency emergency.

Yeah, family emergency I sell shoes there.

No, no don't tell that just they're just fine don't, tell don't be a snitch policy.

[ __, ] me up.

This is like a sunbed I'm quite relaxed here on my sunbed.

Come on London.

Come on.

Okay.

Let's go.

Oh I.

See, you must be able to come in go on London.

Oh I, respect him.

Are they both sideways? I think so they're both sides.

Yes, oh wait.

No, oh I was doing bit Sam's.

Looking at us.

He looks angry I like you sir you're.

A lot of jelly did we do it come on? Not for you just for Sam? Come on? Yeah, it's a bit sexy, too.

Yeah.

What's going on found the corner Gary Come on step it up a bit love.

Wow, that's.

Not very nice I think all day what the [ __ ] love for your eyes.

I'll.

See you later, could you cut me out here? All right? Let's pretend I.

Did it? Yeah.

I conquered my fears.

Look at me.

Go, whoa, whoa.

I, love the side.

Man, damn, that's, the Burj Khalifa.

Woo.

This is presidential swings.

Yeah, jeez, is it your room? Whoa, whoa.

Whoa.

Simon.

The husband's, right here, I, tell you what let's go to your room? Okay, the country get away here.

We go come on in.

Oh, yours actually smells like a farm.

Bro.

It stinks your room, our 40th anniversary our wedding day.

Pretty cool.

It's, pretty cool in here.

So what are you got an ensuite? Yeah, that's.

What I'm interested about I feel like it's in here? Hello Brian.

Wait.

What the [ __ ], oh, my God, it's so cute, oh, all right.

Let's.

Not scare.

It wait does that mean I'm gonna have like Joe Biden in my room.

Now we just have the awkward car ride to catch up with the rest of the group.

You know, it feels like right now, you know how when someone gets dumped on The Bachelor, and they have that awkward drive away in the car like their heart, just got broken that's, what this feels like it's funny given to your fears, kids that's, what you can learn from me the honeymoon suite, oh, my gross bondage team, there's, actually, low-key fire bro.

This is a better in the microwave.

Yo.

So did you put this stuff here? Because this is kind of mad to put in Toby's room.

This is a bit nuts who did that you got tweets I want to eat one, but I don't want to eat one.

You've got ball gags and stuff and a dildo a lava lamps the monetization you actually have sex with that.

It was the shittiest placement for a sex swing by the way because you can't you can't swing, yeah, it should be on here.

But this is duct taped and ceiling.

You're, not need to work on your sex swing placement.

It needs to be up here in the middle are you in the harbor so we're, either getting a yacht.

Oh we're doing a some form of water sports it's.

My prediction.

Yeah, if it's one of the things the fly balls they're.

So sick, I just saw a sign.

This is the yacht club.

Oh, sidemen, Yacht Club.

I could do a yacht though Simon come on come on Simon.

You've got to be in first she wants me in first unlucky said, oh sorry can become something normal it's.

Just a shrine to me do you like the photos? Oh I want to shop them myself then sick.

Thank you.

Let's mess.

Them.

Anyway, I'm gonna honestly take it you're.

Welcome by the way.

Thank you.

So much you're.

A legend, [, __, ] off it's quite strange.

She has photoshops herself with you is it strange? I feel like I'm insomnia 53 again, I like this one the most or the Lord of the Rings.

This is also empty there's.

Nothing I've got a goat in my [ __, ], bathroom, then, okay.

Mad he's pissed on the floor as well.

Did you see? Oh we're on to the docks I'm, really confused I'm, really because we walked past the really nice ones.

Yeah, I can see it.

Yeah, I think it is it's.

The jet skis I'll be Bamboozled if it's not jet skis now, oh it's, not that is it? Well that little inflatable? Um, oh, not a Banana Boat.

No wait is it the car that goes on the water? Is that it? There I think that's it there what a link? Oh, you can see it at the end.

Yeah, oh, yeah.

That is sick.

Hello.

Well, that's, when I was just coming to knock on the door and take you to your first activity if you're ready, oh, yeah.

Okay.